Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Crazy being the operative word here

Over the weekend, the Husband and I went to dinner and a movie. Because we are both trying to stay away from the siren song that is heroin sugar, we opted for Crazy Bowls and Wraps.

I know. We live big around here. What can I say?

We've been to other locations, but this particular franchise was a new visit for us. Seeing as how I am so boring diversified, I opted to get the same salad that I always get. When my salad was brought to our table, I noticed that the usual dressing on the side was missing.

I looked up at our server and asked if she could bring me some dressing. She looked at me like I had just asked for a large bucket of deep fried baby and said, "Um, we don't have any salad dressing."

I looked back at the Husband and then back to our server. "You don't have any dressing? Like at all?"

"No. We don't serve our salads with dressing."

Exsqueeze me? Are you on the same planet I'm on? Eating salad without dressing is like eating rocks or nails. For fun.

That is the whole point of eating a salad. So you can put some dressing on it.

When I told her that the last time I ordered this salad at another location, it came with a very tasty dressing, served on the side, she simply rolled her eyes and went back to the kitchen.

She returned and, with a smile stolen straight from Satan's lips, placed a dish of what I am sure was mayonnaise topped with pepper in front of me. "Here. Try this dressing. It's really good."

Fearing it was actually mayonnaise, pepper, and spit, I left it on the table. Along with most of my very dry, very boring, very unsatisfactory salad.

Tell me I'm not alone in this. Salad MUST have some sort of dressing, right? It doesn't have to swim in it, but a little bit of moisture? A little bit of sauce?

Don't worry, though. I totally made up for it at the movies with a large bucket of popcorn and some Reeses Pieces.

And, of course, a jumbo diet coke.

P.S. The movie was amazing. I would highly recommend it.

28 comments:

yogurt said...

The only salad I've ever eaten without dressing is a taco salad. And that's because it comes with a big dollop of guacamole and hot sauce, i.e., texmex dressing.

I can't imagine a franchise lasting very long with no dressing. Patron wants no dressing? Patron can say "no, thank you."

Terra said...

Ok so my favorite salad dressing is lemon juice squeezed straight from the lemon, if that isn't an option I shoot for the vinegar no oil...So I am boring but YES, my salad needs some kind of a dressing on it.

And A LARGE DIET SODA TOO!

Jeanelle said...

Okay where did you go and what kind of salad was it? Seriously - this requires a letter to the manager because that waitress needs a smackdown. Salads MUST have dressing of some sort.

christina-defining moments said...

Absolutely it needs something and i hate it when waitresses roll their eyes!

Julianna said...

Um. No. Salad must swim in dressing. In fact, at times there must be so much dressing that my "healthy" bits are unrecognizable.

And, That's all I have to say about it.

Unless it's a Ceasar topped with a large amount of white albacore tuna salad. Then I don't really need any dressing.... but otherwise, there's no salad for me!

the wrath of khandrea said...

i often eat my salad without dressing, but only if it has meat and cheese in it as well. that lady was a pretentious beyotch though, with her snide little substitute.

Tristan said...

The whole point of salad IS dressing!! It is so we can slather our healthy stuff in fatty dressing and not feel completely guilty about it. Cuz ya know, you are eating a salad after all! Your server was a bitch!!

mae said...

ya. i love salad without dressing. just like i love salsa without chips and pancakes without syrup...people are straaaange.

frillsfluffandtrucks said...

I never ever use salad dressing or any sort of drizzle of anything on my salad--however I fully realize that I am not the norm and that most people use dressing. In fact, I've never met anyone else who uses no dressing.

~ Sarah

ellen said...

Where do you live?!?

Travelin'Oma said...

This is why it's better to order deep fried coconut shrimp.

Amanda D said...

I've never even heard of that movie. I guess that shows how out of it I am! Glad you enjoyed it.

I'm with you. Salads must have dressing and I prefer lots of croutons. They are the reward for eating salad.

Amanda D said...

I've never even heard of that movie. I guess that shows how out of it I am! Glad you enjoyed it.

I'm with you. Salads must have dressing and I prefer lots of croutons. They are the reward for eating salad.

jessica said...

I'm not sure which is more important to discuss...the craziness of salad minus the dressing or the hotness of Collin Ferrell...

Christie in Dallas, TX said...

Maybe I missed the point, but I thought salads were just the conduits for eating dressing. "I would like a little salad with my dressing!" I can't imagine not having any in a restaurant. Glad the movie and popcorn were good!

calibosmom said...

Ditto Jessica! If I'm not in the mood for sex, I just eat a big ol' salad slathered with Ranch Dressing and my husband practically turns gay. He prefers his salad naked. Sex, gay, naked? What is the matter with me?

shilo said...

I love me some Honey Mustard dressing. Oh, and my salad also needs to have avocado, eggs, cheese, bacon, and big buttery croutons. Bet that place is not for me!

melissa ( : said...

Absolutely! I'm surprised they are still in business!

My new favorite dressing:

Juice of fresh Lemon
Same amount of Canola Oil
1/2 Tsp Sugar
1/2 Tsp Salt
Pepper
Few cloves of Garlic

Let it sit in the fridge for bit....

Romaine Lettuce
Toasted Pecans
Orange Flavored Craisins

YUM..

Becky said...

What the hay?!?!? Twilight Zone. I want to go there and figure out this mystery. I mean, WHAT? I don't get it.

Lauren in GA said...

Sick and Wrong. I can't believe that they had NO dressing. Surely you can't be the first person to have asked for some. She didn't need to be so rude. That was not a crazy or unreasonable request.

Wise not to eat it. I agree...she probably added some spit.

Karey said...

Salad without dressing is almost inedible. Stand strong!

Next time, try popcorn and junior mints. Great combination!

Lauren said...

I work with a girl, (okay, woman) who, for the last 3 years has brought a salad with NO salad dressing, oil, vinegar - NOTHING - for her lunch. Every day. She occasionally throws in a few sunflower seeds or strawberries. But seriously, plain Spring mix?? And yes, it's every day. I don't know about anyone else, but I'm thinking eating disorder!?

Cindy said...

I've never heard of the movie... It looks like one to add to the DVD list when it is released... (I don't enjoy movies at the theater)
As for the salad - it must have dressing. I can't imagine a restaurant attempting to serve a salad without some sort of real dressing - not some "special sauce" the waitress mixes up.

Cares and Mimi said...

Which came first - salad or salad dressing? Certainly it was salad. However, early man (or, more likely, woman) realized quickly that salad without dressing was bogus. Thus, salad dressing was almost instantaneously conceived after the salad. Duh.
Glad you steered clear of the 'dressing' your server brought you. Sweet and Sour Spit dressing is yuck!
Carrie (Cares)

Becca @ Our Crazy Boys said...

I am a bit crazy because I dislike dressing. It makes my salad soggy!

But I have never, ever heard of a restaurant not even offerring!!

Laura said...

Isn't dressing the vehicle that makes the salad even worth eating? Reminds me of the time when we were at a restaurant and the kids got fries with a kids meal. We asked for ketchup, and we were told they didn't have any! What restaurant doesn't have ketchup? (Especially when they serve fries.)

melissa said...

what separates us from the animals if the fact that we put dressing on our vegetables!!!

Anonymous said...

I have to say that you seem like such a BITCH. Are you a mormon by chance? You seem like a mormon