Thursday, September 18, 2008

The genius of the lone trucker


About ten years ago, when McKay was a baby, we were living in Minneapolis while the Husband finished up grad school.

We grew to love Minnesota, in spite of the fact that there are only about eight days a year where you can go outside. And in spite of the fact that they willingly elected Jessie "the Body" for their governor (blame the Husband. I'm pretty sure he voted for him).

Slowly, over time, we even began to understand what the natives were saying when they asked us if we "wanted a baig for that" at the grocery store.

But one the funniest experiences of my life came while we were living there. I was running some errands downtown, and had baby McKay, buckled in his car seat, in the back of the car.

I pulled up to a stoplight, and movement out of the corner of my eye caught my attention. Next to me at the light, was a big 18-wheeler truck, driven by a man who looked a little something like this:


Only not quite so handsome.

He was frantically waving at me, so I smiled, nodded my head, and turned toward the light, hoping that the light would soon turn green.

In spite of my attempt to ignore him, he was practically jumping up and down in his seat. I looked over once again, praying that my life was not about to end at the hands of this apparently-crazy trucker.

He was motioning for me to roll down my window, which I did, in spite of the mental security that thin little piece of glass afforded me.

He smiled, revealing several missing teeth, and said: "Hey lady, you always know where you're going, and he always knows where you've been!"

I nodded politely, smiled, and sped off just as the light turned green, hoping to be spared from any more trucker wisdom which made absolutely no sense at all. Shaking my head and laughing, I started thinking about what he had said.

And by the next block, it hit me. He was referring to McKay in the rear-facing car seat, knowing where we've been. And me, facing forward, knowing where we're going.

Probably the most clever thing I've ever heard from a tattooed, toothless trucker in my life.

I only wish I could find him so I could tell him that I got it.

If you see him, be sure to tell him for me, good one, buddy. Good one.

31 comments:

♥Shally said...

I am pretty sure the same guy lived in Watertown NY.

I saw him at the baseball games with all his brothers ;).

He's the one that would always stand up to heckle the ump then forget what he was going to say mid-sentence.

It sounded something like, "HEY BLUE! YOU STINK LIKE A.... a... hmmmph, er, hmm.."

He was much more articulate with you!

Annie said...

That IS funny. I think you can chalk him up to another fine man flirting with you. Surely he had seen a rear-facing infant seat before in his travels as truck driver?

I think he saw a hot mama and decided to use the line as a small interaction :). But it WAS a funny one, at that.

Annemarie said...

Well, I've been debating whether or not to attend the State Fair. That just sealed it for me. I need to go just to get some sweet carni insight.

Great story!

Diane said...

I'm pretty sure your guy is here, but I'd need a description of the tattoo because the missing teeth are all about the same.

Ilene said...

Never underestimate the wit of a trucker.

Kristy said...

He was just flirting with you Christie. It still takes you a while to get it.

3leftturns said...

I'm diggin the tape measure suspenders... you never know when you'll need to measure something. You might as well do it in style.

BTW, I got the "Joke" the second I read it. You really should hang out with the working man sometime... you might just learn something... I fear you have forgotten your Dixie Valley Ghetto roots. You're way to metropolitan now.

Melissa Walker said...

Well, you know truckers are very deep. They spend a lot of time with their own thoughts late at night, or all day long. They probably have some kind of Mensa Truckers group.

Statman said...

When did Josh grow a beard? (LOL)

Tia Juana said...

As I was reading this and anticipating what could possibly be the ending to another of your great stories, I envisioned that maybe you had forgotten the baby and he was on top of your car or something and your trucker man would save the day! But alas, I am glad that it was just wisdom (and those were some very profound words of wisdom) of a wise truck man and not the awful ending that I had envisioned - the ending similar to when I drove home with all my library books on top of the car but which did not quite all make it home and I had to go drive back from where I came to find them. Because that would be bad if it was a baby!

Oh be grateful for wise words and not my imagination/real life!

Joy & Casey said...

You make me laugh!!!

Bridget said...

Wow. A Hallmark moment from a trucker. Whodda thought?

Jessica said...

There's great wisdom to be gained staring out at the open road for days on end...and avoiding visits to the dentist. Who knows what that laughing gas and fillings are doing to our ability to ponder the great truths of the universe?

danandcindy said...

Wow, Josh has really let himself go...

andrea said...

i was gonna say what annie said. totally getting hit on. he was going to use the same line on you later in the bedroom. and it was going to have a TOTALLY different meaning.

CJ, the Purple Diva said...

First the UPS man now the trucker! Who's next??? The gardner!?
You crack me up!

Hazen5 said...

I think that was cute! Not the man, but his words!

diane said...

I love Minnesota. I pledge allegience to the flaig...
Do you want your receipt with you or in the baig?
Don't you miss bars and hotdish?

Mama Cher, Ok, fine, it's Sharon said...

That. was. AWESOME!! Thanks, I got to laugh out loud and that felt good!

mick said...

after all these years, what made you think of that? btw: you short hair cut fm a few months back suits you beautifully. i love it!mc

Michael said...

It leaves me wondering...why?

Susy said...

TY needed that...I am holed up in the house due to rotater cuff surgery. I need to laugh and just reading your blog always makes me smile!
TY CHRISTIE!

gab said...

That photo of McKay melts my heart. I remember him at that age SO well (I even remember that li'l t-shirt)...when you came to visit us from MN, I wanted to kidnap him!! He was THE CUTEST baby boy I had ever seen. Give him a hug for me today.


And now, I'll go back and read the post...I was too sentimental to focus the first time!

Lauren in GA said...

You are such a fantastic writer. I laughed my way through this post, too. "Only not quite so handsome" and if you wanted a, "baig". Oh, and that you grew to like MN even though there were only about "eight days you could go outside"...oh, you weren't kidding about that ;) Seriously...I luh-hove your writing.

Oh, and I will be sure to tell your trucker friend that you got it and, "good one, buddy. Good one." I am quite sure he lives here in Georgia.

Becky said...

I remember you told me that story once, and I think you just gotta appreciate cool people like that. I love it- he was so excited to tell you his riddle. Weird, yes, but cool at the same time.

Kimberly said...

What a cute story! Andy's comment made me laugh because the last time we were in SL, we were driving down Bangerter HWY and passed the corner to turn to go to your house AND boy has it changed! You guys are funny because, growing up, I never thought your neighborhood was ghetto...I just thought you had some really interesting neighbors!

Brent Festige said...

One time a trucker held me down and spit in my mouth. I still don't get it.

Rosie said...

After my first year in Iowa, I am convinced that cold weather makes people more friendly, even handsome truckers.

Mel @ A Box of Chocolates said...

What a cute story. Thanks for sharing and making me smile!!

melissa ( : said...

I swear I saw your trucker last night at our local grocery store... Except his suspenders are now red. What are the odds?

Andrea said...

Oh my! I haven't been by in a while! What I have missed! Hillarious! And the comments? priceless...

Deep thoughts-those truckers have hidden talents. I guess you do have a lot of time to think, don't you?