Trading Places

Ten Reasons why it might be fun to be her:

1. She is filthy rich.
2. She was married to Brad Pitt and has probably - at the very least - seen him with his shirt off.
3. She has not had a bad hair day since 1994.
4. She looks absolutely perfect in a bikini.
5. She probably has a personal chef, trainer, stylist, and multiple maids come every day.
6. She has no children who would prevent her from flying around the world at a minute's notice in her private jet.
7. She has paparazzi photographing her every move.
8. She is an award-winning actress who is constantly challenged by new roles.
9. She is sought after by men around the world.
10. She has the strength and willpower to give up eating entirely in order to maintain her perfect body.

Top ten reasons why it might be fun to be her:

1. She is not filthy rich, but spends her husbands money like she is.
2. She was never married to Brad Pitt, has never seen him with his shirt off, but probably doesn't have to worry about her husband leaving her for Angelina.
3. Every day she has a bad hair day.
4. She looks positively hideous in a bikini.
5. She is her own personal chef, trainer, stylist, and maid - every single day.
6. She has three very loud children who prevent her from flying all around the world at a moment's notice in her imaginary jet (which she pretends looks a lot like Wonder Woman's invisible jet, complete with headband, lasso, and golden cuffs).
7. She is hounded by paparazzi from the Gab Blog who are seeking exclusive interviews.
8. She tries to channel her inner actress when coming up with new excuses for getting out of tea time with the elderly woman next door every day.
9. She is stalked at the grocery store by only desperate or handicapped men.
10. She maintains the strength and willpower to continue eating on behalf of all the anorexic starlets who cannot, and she embraces her very imperfect body in spite of this.

So who would you rather be? Please don't be honest.