Thursday, December 20, 2007

And now we'll never invite him to another party

Let's just say you have a son. He seems like a good boy. You enjoy him most of the time. He grows up and turns eight. You let him have a party and invite all his friends. One horrid child will bring your son "Frog World." Frog World is a frog habitat, which you think looks like a really cute toy for him to house his plastic frogs.

Your son will fill out the enclosed card requesting the live tadpole that comes with the gift.

He will mail off the card in September.

Then one cold day in December, you will open your mailbox and see this:

Nothing in the mail pile should ever say "Live Tadpoles, Open Immediately!" That does not a good mail day make.

Unless you are them. Then it's the best mail day ever:


So we have a new pet. Against my will.

Chase named him Sir-Croaks-A-Lot. [I'm hoping he's more like a Sir-Croaks-Not.]


Sir-Croaks-A-Lot comes with his own food, which will only serve him for the next four weeks when he is in his tadpole state. Once he becomes a grown-up frog, he will require live crickets. Yes, that's right. I said live.

Sir-Croaks-A-Lot only enjoyed his post on my kitchen counter for about ten whole seconds. Then he was banished to the black hole that is Chase's bedroom.

[Is it wrong to hope we accidentally kill him before the four weeks are up?]

30 comments:

thimblefingers said...

When this tadpole grows up, will he change colors like his cousin i Boston?

Amanda said...

I would be so annoyed! And totally freaked out to see that package in my mail. Also, no there is nothing wrong with hoping for it's demise!

Bridget said...

you are such a good mom! Keep telling yourself that again, and again, and again. every time sir croaks a lot makes his annoying croaking sounds.
Good luck with that, that's all I've got to say.

Amber said...

No rodents or reptiles. Thems are my rules and I'm stickin' to them.

My sympathies to you.

gab said...

Remember the turtles? Didn't Chase name his "Opa"? They didn't last so long. My guess is Sir Croak will be croaking for good soon. Keep us posted!!

Holly said...

I am having Sea Monkey flashbacks! I agree, something marked Live Tadpoles ordering me to open immediately is not something I want to see in my mailbox. However, Chase looks thrilled, so I guess Taddy has a shot at becoming Hoppy. Fingers crossed and all.

Can't wait to hear about the first cricket feeding!

Ashlee said...

I don't think it's wrong to secretly wish for the demise of a pet. :0)
I almost bought one of these for my nephew, but rethought the whole thing when I had to think of what she would give my son to get me back. Yeah....
Have fun with it!

Emily said...

I'm with Gab. Shorten the name one word more to just Sir Croaks. Let's hope for self fulfilling prophecy!

Are You Serious! said...

I'm so not an animal person but I guess I'd rather deal with a frog than a dog or a cat! Good Luck! :)

Annie said...

Yeah, what was the mom thinking letting her son give that gift?

As Bridget said, you are a good mama. Look at Chasey's face. Maybe in the spring Croaky can join his cousins in a pond somewhere?

Do you have to order a package that says "live crickets inside"?

DanandCindy said...

If the frog dies, I'm totally turning you into PETA. They'll be on your front lawn heckling you, and spray painting your fur coat...

Denae said...

I hate all pets. Who is the horrible person that gave him that gift??? I bet he's in heaven though, I know my son would be. Good luck with live Crickets!!!

Jessica said...

What an irresponsible/favorite present!

Marty said...

How cute and funny and annoying! What is it about things that are alive? Why can't kids just stick to stuffed animals?

Paige said...

That just freaks me out.

Kimberly and Devon said...

I will just die if my boys ever want to have a pet that has to be fed LIVE crickets (or LIVE anything for that matter!)!!!

crystal said...

Bwaaaahahahahahaha! That is the ultimate Good Mail! (for a boy)

I'm feeling your pain. My mom took my son & daughter tadpole-catching last summer and we had to bring 'em home. Ewwww. (in the car. on a 6-hr drive.)

You & I should win Mom Points. Blech.

Sparky said...

You should get a little miniature house of seven gables for the frog to play in.

Laura/DaPFG said...

just fyi...live crickets aren't so bad....

i had to feed them to my tarantula....she's dead now, but still.

petsmart sells a whole bag of 'em for a few bucks. you just have to make sure that they don't fall out of the bag when it's time to feed Froggie, because then you'll find them all over your house. but, they say a cricket in the house is good luck, so either way it's sort of a winning situation :P

Emy5 said...

Maybe you could set croaks a lot free in the summer, and hope for the survival of the fittest.

J-Dude's Blog said...

My first thought was "do frogs poop"? Then I remembered that its really not the poop that I would worry about with pet - its the slim and moldy guck that is going to grow in every tiny crevice of the habitat! I am not a fan of any pet that poops, molds, or pee on the walls - our hamster did that so as to not mess up his cage. (I guess I should admire his clear thinking plan of trying to keep the house clean but really this is just not right.) What was that party mom thinking and what were you thinking not taking away the tadpole card RIGHT AWAY!!!

Hint from first hand experience: Fish die IMMEDIATELY if you have soft water as there is not the right 'something' in the water.

Being the good friend that I am, feel free to come over and get some "magic frog water" as I have some!!!

Family Adventure said...

Awww...but mom! Look at that boy's face. He is mesmerized, thrilled and excited. At least for now.

Good luck...and...ehem...betteryouthanme

:)

Heidi

lainakay said...

Ooh fun! That's better than the Uncle Milton ant farm my son got from his AUNT a couple of Christmas' ago. Much creepier... hundreds of tiny little ants in little plastic tubes. Me, with visions of hundred of tiny little ants escaping from those little plastic tubes! Eek!

Mahina said...

oh, i am so sorry! it is funny, though, seeing that it isn't me! just watch, you'll fall in love with sir-croaks-a-lot!

RobynandJoe said...

I don't know what I would do if I saw LIVE TADPOLES written on a package at my doorstep. I would probably think it was junk mail and throw it away. Congrats to Chase on his new pet...have fun supplying him with live crickets!

John Holly Levi & Faith said...

That's a gift to make whoever gave it to him, your son's best friend and whoever's mother it is that gave it to him, your worst enemy.
ICK.

Lisa-Marie said...

Think of all the fun you could have with a revenge gift.

Though I'm drawing a blank as to what is worse than that. Sorry.

My 4 year old daughter came home from her pre-school gift exchange with the HUGEST sucker I have ever seen. That is ALMOST as bad. What are these mothers thinking? Oh. They're not!

June Cutoff Cash said...

Sir-Croaks-a-Lot is a really good name.

I could never. NEVER. open that package. Ugh.

But seriously. Look at that kid's face. He already loves him some Sir-Croaks-a-Lot.

I am so sorry.

Signed,
Madame Laughs a Lot at Your Plight

Becky said...

Gross! But, I would suck it up and do for my boys who are NOT supposed to think it's gross. Good job.

Nettie said...

I had a tadpole as a child. I somehow missed the transformation. One morning my tadpole had suddenly become a frog. It was a fun thing for me. And, you'll be happy to know, he (she?) didn't survive very long.