Monday, August 16, 2010

Maybe, just maybe

My kids go back to school tomorrow. All week I have watched them with melancholy in my heart, loathe to part with them.

The past few days, I even mentally composed a touching, heart-felt post describing my feelings in great detail. One that would make all of you weep right alongside me.

And then...

Then they spent today fighting and tormenting each other.

And they whined to go to the pool. Then whined to go home once we got to the pool.

And left me a present of muddy shoes in the laundry room sink.

And accidentally dumped an entire plate of rice on the floor. Then attempted to sweep it up with a broom, leaving a sticky trail of wet rice behind.

And spilled -- not one -- but TWO glasses of milk at dinner.

And on my hands and knees, mopping it all up, I decided I actually might be ready for them to go back to school.

But then...

Then I walked past the boys' room and smiled at them -- heads together, bent over a Calvin & Hobbs book, their laughter filling the air.

And I hugged my baby girl goodnight, and for the millionth time kissed the tiny freckles dotted across her button nose. Her hair, smelling sweetly of shampoo, brushed my cheeks as we parted and I had to reach back down and hug her tight again.

And I talked a nervous middle schooler through his schedule yet again, loving the way he shrugged at the end of it saying, "Thanks, Mom," as though I accomplished a huge feat.

And I laughed out loud when my funny, quirky middle son set out his first-day-of-school-clothes, planning to wow his classmates with his retro Jaws tee shirt and his current favorite read. Noting with a smile, the man-eating theme with which he's chosen to start the fifth grade.

And at the end of the day I decided that maybe, just maybe, I might miss these little people after all.

19 comments:

Rochelleht said...

Ah, Calvin and Hobbes. The bane of my existance. It's not bad, or anything. I'm just SO over it. My kids' favorite thing of the summer. They even formed a Calvin and Hobbes club with the cousins and wrote an anthem. I think our kids would get along great! Muddy shoes and all (that is, when Grace actually wears shoes)!

Lala said...

oh Christie- 2 of the boys start Next Monday & I am SO sad. Kindergarten & Second grade. I can't imagine sending them off to middle school! It is sad, even if they sometimes make life not so fun.

Lindsey said...

Maybe you will for a few hours. . .

brooke said...

I envy you. Kids going back to school is always bittersweet. My problem is--my easy kids are going back to school and I'm left with a high maintenence two year old and a newborn. Heaven help me.

Ash said...

a jaws tee? how cool is that! :)

Chatter said...

I am so thankful I won't have to be sending any kids off to school just yet. Good luck tomorrow mama :)

Tristan said...

It is full of mixed feelings huh? I too am ready for them to go back to school and enjoy a few hours quiet. But on the other hand, I'm so not ready for summer to end.

Karey said...

Good luck. I SO know how you feel. I took my daughter who is starting Jr. High to get her schedule and locker/combo yesterday. We practiced opening her locker, walked through her schedule so she'd know where all her classes are then came home.

Throughout the day she talked to various friends only to find that she has NO classes with any of them. NOT EVEN ONE! My heart is breaking for my poor nervous daughter.

When school is hard for them, it's also hard for us!

Andy Johnson said...

You know what they say about spilled milk...

calibosmom said...

I'm not ready yet but I think I'll be kicking them gently out the door on the 30th. I have one starting high school and one starting middle school-its starting to go waaaay too fast.

yogurt said...

You are one giant step ahead of me on the mother-love totem pole. I don't think I've felt even a tad of melancholy. Trying to keep two tweens and a teen entertained all summer (while nagging to keep their rooms clean) is more than this mom can take. Bring on the pencils, books and 7:30am school bus!

danandcindy said...

Too bad they won't miss you.

jen@odbt said...

Hope today went well for them and you. Today was a day I wish they were in school for those reasons you mentioned. I'm still waiting for the moment(s) when I change me mind...there's still time left in the day.

Michelle said...

ah, you'll miss them. I can hardly stand the thought of mine going. ;(

Wynn Anne said...

Y'know what? I think this post PERFECTLY sums up the essence of motherhood: nails-on-the-chalkboard misery balanced by the most heart-wrenching love imaginable. Wouldn't miss it for the world.

Becca @ Our Crazy Boys said...

Awh... *sniff*

How did it go?

Jess said...

This made me cry. Mine don't go back until September 1, and I am so sad about it. I'm good at giving them roots, but the wings part? I really need to work on that.

Hope the first day back was a a huge success!

Jess

jessica said...

It's the same every year...wanting to let them go and hold on to them for dear life all at the same time.

Lauren in GA said...

My computer has been in the shop...and boy have I missed you!

You said it all perfectly. I feel the same, wanting them to stay...wanting them to get the heck out of my hair...I love the way you wrote about the mixed feelings.

Brian is into wolves right now. I have been hearing in great detail how they track their unsuspecting prey. I should get him that book.