Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Let's take a vote on Durga Kameneini...

Okay, internets, I need your help.

You may recall a few of the annoyances that have come as a result of our cross-country move. Like this, or this, or even this. But my newest disaster takes the cake (and those of you who find my problems about as interesting as what's growing under your toenails, feel free to click off right now to someplace more intellectually stimulating, like this).

Like the good, responsible person that I am, I spent hours (in California) calling to hook up utilities, phone, internet, garbage, sewer, etc., assuming I knew what I was doing. It wasn't until AFTER I had spent all these hours that I learned of the unacceptability of DSL internet for The Husband. I mean, if we can't get those BYU Cougar Podcasts as fast as technology will allow, it is reason for life not to go on.

But because I do love The Husband, I made another round of phone calls and switched us back to cable internet. In doing so, I had to switch our phone service as well because of the package deal they had. The only problem was that we would not be able to keep that phone number. But since we hadn't really given it to too many people and weren't moving for a few months, we didn't think it was a big deal.

Still with me? Hang in there. Especially you, Daniel.

So we move here. I move in, begin living my life, and start calling people. I notice that I am getting a lot of voicemails and answering machines when I call, but I don't think too much about it. I'm new and friendless, after all, and people are busy. With all their many friends and such.

But then one day my mother-in-law accidentally answers my call and tells me the name Durga Kameneini is coming up on her caller-ID. Which is why she (and everyone else I know) do not answer when I call.

After FOUR aggravating, hour-long phone calls, the phone company and I have come to an impasse. They cannot fix the problem. They do not know why Durga Kameneini shows up every time I call someone. They have essentially shrugged their shoulders at me and bid me good luck.

Which resulted in much yelling (by me) on the phone (to them). I am now left with three options.

Option one is to change phone numbers , which I am loathe to do given that all our family, friends, and church congregation have our current number. It's on all the school paperwork, ballet classes, and swimming lesson forms. And when you introduce a new number? Then suddenly people aren't sure which number is right. They might call the wrong one. Maybe they never got the word that you have a new one. Kids suddenly don't get picked up when they fall and have broken legs (yes, that is exactly what I see happening. Stupid, I know).

Option two is to switch to a "blocked call" status. Which would mean that when we call anyone, our number is blocked and shows up as "anonymous" on caller-ID. You know, just like the salesman that call at dinnertime or the surveys that ring at seven o'clock in the morning. Which you never answer because you know it's not anybody important. We'd be sharing THAT status. It's not the worst choice necessarily, but when we call someone who has anonymous call rejection (my parents, for one), we will not be able to get through. At all. Ever. Our current company doesn't have a fancy star-number-number we can dial to be able to get through (I asked). Our calls are eternally blocked to these numbers.

The third option is to do nothing. I can leave it as-is, and accept that I am Durga Kameneini when I call people. I can almost always guarantee that every time I make a phone call I'll get someone's voicemail. I mean, even my own mother-in-law doesn't answer for Durga. And do I blame her? Sure, I can explain the situation to everyone I know, but I still dislike having to face that embarrassment and explanation when I call someone that DOESN'T know. And if it was a remotely common name, I probably wouldn't care. But Durga Kameneini? COME ON!

Do you see my dilemma? What would you do? Leave me a little comment with your vote. I don't know what to do. I leave my fate in your hands. Help!

31 comments:

gab said...

it's ok Durga...i'll take your call anytime, baby!

marta said...

stie.. this is a problem. i see your dilemma. perhaps it's best to remain as DURGA. there are definite pros to having a random caller-ID name.

sometimes it's easiest to fess up to stuff when you have DURGA to fall back on. like apologizing to the bishop for the loud beeping on sunday.. or calling up nathaniel hawthorne house...

you can make all your wrongs right with the help of DURGA. plus, who wouldn't want an alias?! go with it. and scrap a page all about it.

girlymama said...

I'd probably just stay Durga for awhhile, but keep calling and harrassing the phone company until you get some nice person who knows how to change it.

Besides, people might answer the phone out of curiosity. (Who is this guy and WHY does he keep calling me???)

Can you switch to viop? We did and we could keep our phone number...

Annie said...

Now I want you to call me so I can see the Durga! I think it's a great incognito name so I vote either #3 (keep it and laugh about it) or #1 if it really bugs you. You haven't been there that long and you probably listed your cell phone, too, on all the forms so if they can't get you at one number, they'll try the next one.

Why do you get all the really entertaining problems?

Annie said...

Hey, I just realized there's a 4th option: change your name to Durga Kameneini. That'll solve all your problems!

Holly said...

Durga-stie has a nice ring to it I suppose. Surely there is someone at the phone company that knows how to change it?!?
If it really is awful being Durga, go ahead and change it and start fresh--though since you seem have the best luck ever--your next name or experience might be worse!

Emily said...

Stie (or Durga) I laughed out loud here in the office by myself at 10:00 p.m. I laughed thinking of you saying you could hear the hesitation in my voice when I answered the phone thinking it would be one of Chris' foreign friends over in India that make all his power point slides. Just go for it -- be Durga. Like has been voiced before, it's a great fall-back/alias/alter ego etc. . .

Bridget said...

Oh, Stie. This would happen to you. How funny. I actually have a friend here whose caller ID always shows up James Tillett. Her husband is not James, nor is her last name Tillett. I decided to google the name just for fun. Turns out this was an young boy who was abducted and killed. (at least one of the James Tilletts out there) I checked out Durga for you. He's just a project manager for an electrical and electronic manufacturing company.

Long story even longer, I think you should stay with Durga. It makes for such a great story.

Jenny from Chicago said...

Embrace your inner Durga...annoying? yes. inconvenient? absolutely, Fodder for more blog posts? you bet your sweet bippy.

Michael said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Michael said...

I googled Durga for you, and apparently she is not on the "no fly" list, so if you call the airport, they won't freak out. She seems like a pretty average person. For all we know, she's a white, middle-aged woman, suffering from the name her hippie parents gave her in the sixties. Maybe she even tried to get it changed on the caller ID, but because she couldn't, she decided to move, thus leaving you with her lifelong predicament. I say keep it. That way your true identity will remain hidden from the people you don't want to have it. Have you considered registering your cell phones under Durga?

Michael said...

contact her yourself...?

http://www.linkedin.com/pub/2/602/595

Kimberly and Devon said...

If I were you, I would tell everyone you know that you are now a secret agent working for the government and in order to keep your cover you had to take on the alias name "Durga." From now on you can blame things on your alias "Durga." If your phone bill doesn't get paid, whose fault is it? "Durga!"

Marty: said...

Dear Durga,
I think this post will help. Also, email all your friends (are they really friends if they don't read your blog?) and tell them your new name. Live with it a year. Then next year, when you would normally move, but won't this time, change your number just in time for all the new directories. Then blog and email us all again, and we'll follow right along.

Maybe with the proper pronunciation the name Durga sounds pretty. Try it with an Austrian accent.

Darilyn said...

That would drive me crazy having a strange name show up. I would go with option number 2 personally. But if you can have a sense of humor about it then stick with Durga.

DanandCindy said...

How does durgsthoughts.blogspot.com sound?

Emily said...

p.s. Thanks for the bit of Lindsey!

Amber said...

I'd switch it. Personally, I don't answer blocked calls or ones that tout crazy foreign names. :-) It's a pain but I'd rather get it right than live with it.

Case in point: we lived with my inlaws for six months while our house was being built. They obviously share our same last name and after more than three years, the post office STILL doesn't have the forwarding right. And they STILL get a crapload of our mail. And I will STILL keep staslking them until they get it right.

Mique said...

Yet another reason you should've stayed in CA. a) that would've never happened here (yah right) and b) that name is common around here. I just met a Durga last week (jk of course)....
Too funny. But I hate when you have to choose between the lesser of two (or 3 in this case) evils. My vote would be to stay Durga too.

dcrmom said...

I don't know what's funnier, the comments, or your post! LMAO! Despite the overwhelming majority of Durga fans, I would DEFINITELY CHANGE MY NUMBER. Sorry...

mama jo said...

i, too, have loved all the comments...but durga sounds so fun..who gets to change their whole identity when they are 30? so you can be mr and mrs durga...and i loved the lindsay video..of course, if you went to smith's in provo you could see her singing in person...

gramakas said...

I think you should "get Gephart"... he is a guy here on the channel 2 news that goes to bat on just this kind of non-helpful customer service that we get so often from big "service providing" companies. Maybe you have a "gephart-guy" there where you are living or maybe ours can direct you to someone there that could help. Good luck!! I must admit I don't think I'd pick up a call from Durga Kameneini especially at mealtime or naptime!

RobynandJoe said...

That is so funny...my brother called and told me I needed to read your blog...the comments were just as funny. Even if you change your number, now that you've blogged about being Durga, the name's probably going to stick either way. You might as well just keep it...thanks for the laugh, Durga dear.

anna jo said...

stie, deep down in my heart of hearts I secretly wish I could be durga kameneini. you have all the luck.

Kelly said...

i like the sound of durga... it's got a nice ring to it.

Emily said...

Holy Cow! You get 25 comments?!

Mique said...

So Christie, email me and I can get your fabulous "prize" to you......I've got GREAT fabric to use with your word. I thik you'd love it!

Dancin Queen said...

That's so funny. My experience with phone companies is that it doesn't matter how many times you call and re-explain the problem, it never gets fixed. I always just end up giving up.

Kelly said...

I'm sorry, this is too funny, and I love the way you've shared it! It doesn't seem that there really is a good solution for you and Durga -- I hope the two of you can come to some sort of understanding!

Amanda said...

So...What did you decide to do? We're dying to know!

Bill said...

The real you has been identified... Wikipedia has for "Durga"... "In Hinduism, Durga (Sanskrit: "the inaccessible") is a form of Devi, the supreme goddess. In Bengal, she is said to be the mother of Ganesha, Kartikeya as well of Saraswati and Lakshmi. Durga is depicted as a warrior woman riding a lion or a tiger with multiple hands carrying weapons and assuming mudras, or symbolic hand gestures. This form of the Goddess is the embodiment of feminine and creative energy." Rock on Durga