Monday, January 4, 2010

Just trying to obey my president

I feel proud in admitting that my life is anything but glamorous. Our daily routine is about as far as you can get from the paparazzo-stalked lives of those I see on the covers of my favorite smut mags at the grocery store.

Unlike a lot of the celebrities on those covers, I am not thin and starving. Vera Wang does not dress me. I have the unfortunate privilege of having to style my own hair every morning. And nobody is standing out on my front lawn hoping to catch a glimpse of me in juicy sweatpants, wearing no make-up.

Lord help us, that would be quite a fright for the paparazzos now, wouldn't it?

But what my life lacks in spontaneous excitement, it definitely makes up for in predictability.

And being the OCD freak that I am, I like me some predictability. It's reassuring and familiar. A warm blanket of routine and order. You can count on it to be there, come rain or come shine.

For instance, I can predict, with almost one hundred percent certainty, which of my three children will not like dinner on any given night.

I can predict who will be bored at which movie. And who will whine the most when dragged through which store. There is a certain comfort in the familiar and habitual behaviors that we all have.

Take this girl, for example. I know that my mini-me she will not willingly utter a word in the morning to anyone until after she's been fed:

[Sadly, I know that because she gets it from me. I feel you, girlfriend!]

I can also predict that each week, one of the little people in this house (whose name just happens to rhyme with 'Base') will always have a larger pile of laundry than the others. There's the same number of days between washings, but magically he seems to dirty more clothes.

(I'm pretty sure that he's just adverse to actually hanging the clean clothes up.)

And I feel confident in predicting that this little fashionista will never stop raiding my closet. Doesn't seem to bother her that our shoe sizes are not remotely the same either.

Who am I to deny the diva her most critical knee-high boots for afternoon playtime?

But in all the predictability, there is one area which is a source of constant scrutiny for me. It is my eternal struggle between what I want to do and what I know I should do.

Help me, dear friends.

Why is it that when I know I should be eating this:

All I really want to be eating is this?

I think Woodrow Wilson said it best when he said, "If you want to make enemies, try to change something."

Well, Mr. President, I definitely don't want to be making any enemies.

Warm bread and jam it is. If you insist.


Terra said...

Perfection. You never cease to amaze me with your posts! And yes, I would eat jam and bread!

Jen said...

Life's too short - eat the jam & bread!

Your girl rocks those boots - better watch out when she can wear your shoe size or better yet...a shopping partner in crime.

Jeanelle said...

Okay, the combo of what looks to me like crunchy corn bran (my all time fave cereal!) and oatmeal squares looks HEAVENLY! Yes the bread looks good but cereal is ALMOST like bread. Okay, it's nothing like bread, especially homemade, hot from the oven bread dripping in butter and jam. I'm salivating now. And are your kids eating Reese's Puffs? (I'm totally guessing.) But that is so my guilty pleasure cereal, in case you were wondering. And thus ends the longest comment of 2010. The End.

Lindsey said...

Please don't post picutres of pure fluffy delicious gorgeous, did I mention fluffy? BREAD (which I am no craving thank you) without posting a recipe!!! I want to make it.. RIGHT NOW! (And that recipe looks goooooooooooooooooooood.) Please send.

brooke said...

Hannah looks sooo cute in those boots. Scary cute.

I am so with you on being grouchy McGrouch in the mornings. I don't even want anyone to talk to me or look at me until after 8:00.

the wrath of khandrea said...

i was wondering where you were going with this. i like where you went.

Annemarie said...

Ooh, ooh...don't forget to slather that warm bread with butter first!!

Travelin'Oma said...

I'd love to be at your house right now with real live kids and real live bread. I live a virtual life.

Tristan said...

Yum on the bread! My breakfasts have to be liquids now (band is most tight in the mornings). But I do enjoy me some nice warm from the oven bread!

Love the knee-high boots! Love the diva!

diane said...

It's whole wheat bread right?

Aubrey said...

Oh man, I wish I had some bread now--I have plenty of freezer raspberry-peach jam for it.

I'm with Hannah--nobody mess with me in the morning. My children still don't get it.

And she looks so fab in those boots.

Lauren in GA said...

Those loaves are true things of beauty.

Stie, your writing is poetic. I love it.

Those boots are totally awesome on your diva. I want her to come to my house so I can hang out with her.

cannwin said...

You know I've always wondered, why is it that I can't look that cute in a pair of sweatpants? Is it because I buy mine at Wal-mart for $6 instead of on 5th Ave for $600. I sure would like to know so that I can start wearing 'juicy sweatpants' every day. :)

danandcindy said...

Woodrow Wilson was a socialist progressive b@$tard.

The Hansens said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Meg said...

Really? You haven't tried mint m&ms. Well YUMM you have to. But sadly, they are seasonal right now to Christmas and I can't find them anywhere now.

I emailed the company and told them it was a travesty so I am hoping my easter they might have some too.

I can only find them at Target mostly. They are back by their seasonal section when they do have them in a light green bag.

Keep your eyes peeled. :)

Cindy said...

I'd do the warm bread with jam. Hands down.

Anna said...

Bread, butter and jam for me too!! I'll have a resurrected body some day so why not?

Ilene said...

You don't even want to see the pile of laundry in my laundry room. Five loads.

Of clean laundry. I loathe folding clothes.

Gimme bread. And doughnuts. And a midafternoon chocolate snack. Oh, and cookies for later.