Tuesday, January 27, 2009

A little lesson for the Midwest

Oh, you loopy, loveable midwesterners. You are a classic paradox.

Hardy and strong, you bravely face the endless muggy summers filled with heat, heat, more heat, and mosquitoes. You cheerfully take your kids to the park on days so hot that one actually sweats in a cold shower. You are out jogging in air that is 95 degrees with 80 percent humidity.

Yes. With smiles on your faces.

And yet, when the mere possibility of a few inches of snow is before you, you abandon all logic. You run to the grocery store and hastily clear the shelves of bread, eggs, milk, and toilet paper. You preemptively salt your driveways. You stockpile the firewood and hunker down with quilts to worship the weatherman on t.v.

And then, in a panic, you declare a snow day and cancel school.

Before the snow has actually, you know, fallen.

Well, my not-so-hardy winter friends, let me give you a little lesson. When it snows like THIS, there should, indeed, be a snow day:

(Our front yard in Boston, circa 2005)

Not when it snows like THIS:
Our front yard, about ten minutes ago

Any questions?

[All this excitement, by the way, led one of my children, who shall remain nameless, (*cough*Chase*cough*) to wake up at 4:30 a.m., and not be able to fall back asleep. That naturally led him to wake his siblings at, say, 4:43 a.m. And, of course, none of them would go back to sleep. I blame you, crazy midwest people. Thanks a lot.]

36 comments:

Melanie said...

Same thing happened here in Indy too...and this may be no consolation, but I don't have school age kids, mine went to daycare:) I feel for you though...

~ Uncle Sam's Family, Est. September 1994 ~ said...

This post made me laugh so hard! You have skillfully put into words exactly what I have been thinking! I couldn't have said it better myself! :-)

chacha said...

I remember that year in '95-96 - I was a senior in HS in Massachusetts and it snowed so freakin' much we were afraid we weren't going to finish the year early with all the days off we had. Because that was the most important thing at 17 - to be able to get out of school before June 1st while all the other underclassmen were stuck there another 3 weeks!

That was also the year I learned to drive, in all that snow. Not ideal, but somehow I managed not to wreck the parents' car.

Melissa Walker said...

I can't believe they cancelled school! That wouldn't happen in Chicago--believe me!

Tia Juana said...

Last night when we got the call, Joe came to me and said "I have bad news!" It couldn't have been worse! I moaned very loud and screamed "NOOOOOO!". The children looked at me like I was crazy. And Joe ever so calmly stated, "It's just that mom doesn't do so well with all of you home at once...."

That, along with your words which so adequately sum up my feelings, pretty much sums it up.

I hate snow days.

Lynsie said...

I am sure we had a total of 2 snow days my entire schoolhood (like childhood) We used to pray and pray and pray for a snow day when it would snow 4 feet in 2 hours, never happened here in Utah.

But there is barely a scuff in your yard, what were people thinking??
hehe

Ilene said...

4:30 am? I hope you put turned on the t.v. and went back to sleep.

Chatter said...

It doesn't happen in NE Indiana either. They never canceled school when I was a kid (I'm sure times have changed). It's a Missouri thing Stie :). They aren't used to this stuff so it sends everyone into panic mode.

Rosie said...

Right before Winter Break our school was cancelled because heavy snowfall was predicted. The snow never fell. Last week, school was cancelled because of predicted cold. Not snow, just because it was cold. That really surprised me. Load 'em up and take 'em to a movie. That'll kill some time.

Terra said...

lmao, thanks for sharing. they do that here in COlorado too, we have been known to get 5 feet in a day but when we get a dusting our commute is 3 hours instead of 10 minutes, the shelves at the stores are empty and people complain like there is no tomorrow. Then the sun comes out a couple hours later, they are shedding coats and mittens and getting sunburned in the middle of winter.

Michelle said...

When we used to live in Texas they would close schools for just as little snow as that. My husband and I used to laugh.

That really is funny that they clossed schools for so little snow. I mean, there isn't even anything on the street! Too funny.

Jenibelle said...

I lived in Fairbanks, Alaska for 4th, 5th and 6th grade...we were studly up there, no snow days at all, but if the temp got to be 20 below, we got to stay home.

Nikki said...

St Louis doesn not know how to do snow. I wouldn't necessarily put them in a class with other midwesterners though. I think of a true Midwesterner being very winter/ snow hearty- since I'm a Mighigan midwesterner. :)

andrea said...

call me an idiot, but what exactly ARE the "midwest" states. never understood that. i mean, i'm thinking "middle, west" and that, to me, so sort of colorado-ish.

no? feel free to educate me.

andrea said...

also, feel free to educate me on when to use a question mark.

Michael said...

i need a snow day right about now... utah (especially byu) will never declare one. if the handcart companies could do it, why can't we every day of our lives? i'm moving to missouri.

Woman Interrupted said...

I had no idea that the good people of the Midwest were such snow-phobes. I always assumed that anywhere north of Dallas can take it.

Robyn said...

I'm never moving to the mid-west! So funny! And 4:30 in the middle-of-the-night morning? Ouch!

diane said...

They know about real snow days where I grew up in the midwest that is Minnesota.

Becky said...

What the?!?!?!

Holly said...

LOL! Oh too funny! We understand snow days in Idaho all too well. And it has to be pretty bad before you get a snow day!

Jessica said...

You KNOW I feel you here. Although we did have 3 feet of snow in 24 hours and so it was sort of necessary, but basically snow days aren't what they're cracked up to be. Especially considering my kids will be making up their grey, wintry, in-the-house days, at the end of the school year when it is lovely and warm outside. BLech.

Hazen5 said...

You are so right! That's how San Diego acts when it rains!

Lauren in GA said...

You always make me laugh! I loved this! While still living in my homeland of southwest Virginia we had a Bishop from Idaho that used to scoff at the panic that ensued when we got an inch or so of snow.

Of course...school wasn't canceled before the snow actually started falling.

Doesn't that beat all...when kids wake up when they don't have to. It happens here, too...Madness I tell you.

Bridget said...

Thanks for posting that picture and reminding me how happy I am to not live in Massachusetts anymore.

Joy & Casey said...

Hey! They need to come to Utah and see our Snow!!! I remember when I was a nanny in Virginia and everything shut down over as much snow as you have in your front yard-no church, no school, no nothing. Seriously!!?? They need to get out and see what snow can really look like!
By the way...how the heck are ya???

Annemarie said...

That's pretty wimpy to cancel school for that.

Did your kids put on full snow attire and attempt to build a snowman?

TravelinOma said...

I would have welcomed a few snow days in the old days when we would get 10" on our driveway and I had to take kids to early morning whatever. I hate to say it, but some folks are wimps!

calibosmom said...

I don't know...I think the Midwest is rubbing off on the Northeast. We have a snowday today and it's barely snowing! Granted it was only a half day today-which is a whole other blog post but anyway, a bad call if you ask me. At least we went to the library yesterday and stocked up on books and flicks. Wussies!

♥Shally said...

Um... Ya. People FREAK out here if it is RAINING. They are so scared to drive- so they go REALLY slow and thus cause more accidents.

We had one snow storm here that left about 3 inches. They shut down the schools. What was funny is that we had planned to go to see Twilight with a bunch of girls and over half of them cancelled because of the snow. 3 INCHES PEOPLE! And the theater is less than a mile away. CALL 911!! IT IS SNOWING!!!

gab said...

This post rings loud and clear in my neck o' the woods.

Every morning I have to literally pull Jake out of bed. (Today he was so excited at the possibility of a snow day, the kid was up at 5:14! THE ONE DAY I COULD SLEEP IN.) I wish I could send him over to spaz with Chase.

Cindy said...

We had the same experience when I lived back east. They declared a snow day the night before the storm was supposed to hit. The snow didn't fall. Not even one flake. I loved it. My mother didn't!

Rochelleht said...

Oooh! OWE! We're canceled today, too. But since my kids just flew in on a late airplane last night, they slept in. I LOVE that pic of Boston snow. CRAZY!

Dawn said...

First time reading your blog...not sure what a snow day is...we are in So Cal ;) I saw some of those strapping mid-weasterners in Wal-Mart while I was visiting a friend in IN. We don't grow em' like that out here..

melissa ( : said...

Seriously! All our friends stuck back in Utah can never complain about the snow again... we've got our own ski resort in our front yard.

CJ, the Purple Diva said...

Oh sistah, you so crack me up!
And today...was one of those days...the one in the later picture. And guess what, yep, NO school! The whole city shuts down. Oh, and get this....the weather people didn't know it was coming...but GUESS WHO DID? YEP, I DID! I kept telling my kids, those are snow clouds, it's sure cold enough to snow...that wind feels like a chilly snow is on the way...YEP, sure did. DID THEY BELIEVE ME? HECK NO! DID THEY SEE WHO WAS RIGHT THIS MORNING? YEP, sure did! LOL
Guess I need to call the weather man and offer my services!
Now, if I can figure out how to get the city organized with slag, maybe they could you know, keep the city open!
I'm just saying. You know me sis, anything I can do to help!
Sure great to read your hysterical posts! You crack me up!